yian(:

2009-01-25T00:22:00.000+08:00

http://www.polyvore.com/

I LIKE THIS WEBSITE ALOT :D :D

Alive! :D

2009-01-15T13:39:00.000+08:00

Hmm I just realised that my blog is really dead.
REALLY DEAD.
Wait that's probably the understatement of the year no kidding.

Its finals week! Or aka shootmeweek.
Which totally explains the logic behind why I decided to revive my blog.

Western thought is killing me omggggg. Theres like so many thinkers to study ahhh! Let me see if i can even remember their names correctly. St. Augustine St. Anselm Aquinas Bacon Descartes Ockham Cusa Becker Easton Luther Calvin Paine Jefferson Rousseau Schopenhauer Hegel Kant Marx Nietszche Ortega Nouy Quinnett.
Yeah thats it.
Not alot, not alot at all! More like;

Death by a million small cuts/
Life measured out in tiny spoonfuls.

But it's all good, because today I will stay alive. Because of everyone back home and gang&plan OPA! :D

Though the rose may wither, it shall one day bloom again.

Snowflakes.

2008-10-29T01:52:00.000+08:00

The first snowflakes gently floated down
Just a moment, and then they were gone
Gone, like you were gone.

Casting

2008-10-12T20:22:00.000+08:00

Never cast about at random, for it is usually done purposefully, though it is unseen.
Usually when we are casting, we are extending hope.
Every cast is an extension of hope, an unseen reality in which we believe to be there, but may not be there.
However, when we realize that they are unseen, we stop casting.
And that extension of hope flies away, like a wisp of straw.

D2.

It ended before it even began.

2008-07-07T23:20:00.002+08:00

Apologise - One Republic ft. Timbaland

I'm holding on your rope,
Got me ten feet off the ground
I'm hearin what you say but I just can't make a sound
You tell me that you need me
Then you go and cut me down, but wait
You tell me that you're sorry
Didn't think I'd turn around, and say...

It's too late to apologize, it's too late
I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late

I'd take another chance, take a fall
Take a shot for you
And I need you like a heart needs a beat
But it's nothin new
I loved you with a fire red-
Now it's turning blue, and you say...
"Sorry" like the angel heaven let me think was you
But I'm afraid...

It's too late to apologize, it's too late
I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late.

&it always ends in tears.

People always leave, remember?

Updates.

2008-06-29T22:14:00.000+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOONY!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY NICOLE!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY EVA! (:

<3

Thanks for the movie today arnie! I really enjoyed myself! :D Seriously though, that guy is as dumb as my dad :O

Sometimes, life surprises you with the best of gifts, even when everything seems bad.
I have fallen.

PianoArts pikchas! (:

Party at Sue's house! :D

Me, Amy & Choo choo! (:

<3!

(:/):

2008-06-25T11:35:00.002+08:00

Ni hen cuh ai(!) Yes you, really. Not me, no. I miss you.
Mister 13/14, <3.

TWO REPLIES! :D

If you ain't here I just cant breathe.

People always leave.

2008-06-25T03:33:00.000+08:00

I HATE it when people leave.
I never want(ed) this night to end.
But it did, 2h ago, when you left.

So give me a solution, cos we got a big problem here. It was only three days, oh you lady's man you really know how don't you. Actually come to think of it, no. It's just you. And THATS my big problem here.

YOU BETTER REPLY MY EMAIL YOU DOUCHEBAG. (Just kidding <3)

Dont be a stranger, bulaien.
Dont be like the others.

Wake up, it's time to face up to reality.

2008-06-23T23:16:00.000+08:00

Life is a bitch, you know that?
That's all I have to say.

Make it another two weeks, and I might, oh you lady's man.
Just when something makes you happy, its over and you have to go.
One more day.

People always leave.
Remember?

The caged bird does not sing.

2008-06-19T07:12:00.003+08:00

WHERE IS THE FRIGGIN CAR I WANNA GO OUTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT :O
Stupid US of A. They seriously need to think about public transport. Not everyone has a car to spare you know Mr. President.
I NEED TO GET OUT FROM HERE LIKE NOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW Damn it.

If my aunt comes back with that dood at 830 I am going to be a very pissed person indeed.
Like sheriousry where is the goddamnedfreakingcarwhatthehellmannnnnn.

F.M.L.

I felt every ounce of me, screaming out,
But the sound was trapped deep in me.

Welcome to my life.

2008-06-18T07:38:00.002+08:00

I declare Cosco a failure.
No One Tree Hill.
No The OC.
No Gossip Girls (no that wasnt for me).
No Gilmore Girls.
No Grey's anatomy.

&all they had was Boston something Desperate houswives Ugly Betty and Prison Break. And some other lame ass tv shows. THEY HAD THEM IN MARCH WTF IM SO PISSED. The cherry topping to a beautiful day dont you think so?

F.M.L.

Fairytales in hell.

2008-06-16T03:05:00.002+08:00

One day, a genie appeared in front of me and granted me one wish.
So I wished for all the goddamned freaking pianos on the planet to be smashed.

If only fairytales existed.
But then again the other proabable solution is to sue Walt Disney.

FUCKMYLIFE.

2008-06-10T13:43:00.002+08:00

HA ARNIE I AM VERY HONOURED INDEED TO HAVE A SINGLE POST ALL TO MYSELF (:
Yes yesterday was fun right omg when I closed the door she was like does your mouth hurt hahaha. I mean there were so many things to catch up on! Like coughcough some people who've taken extra measures to make themselves look absolutely disgusting, and others.

AND WE ARE SO HAVING A CELLO PARTY WHEN I COME BACK OMG.
PARTAYYYEEE.

OKAY I NEED TO BOARD NOW.
FOR FREAKING DETROIT.

Catching up.

2008-06-08T21:56:00.002+08:00

After reading rach's post about how many people have forsaken their blogs I have to admit that I am definitely one that is guilty. And I most definitely agree with her - you're never going to find me saying 'Yet another post about what I have accomplished today in my Very Very Very interesting life'.

Some accomplishments lately:
1. My best friend is not as bad now
2. Piano still drives me nuts
3. Let it go; everything in the past, just let it go.
4. Found a friend again, someone I lost; I've missed you.

&Take a breath.

Fire and Ice.

Some say the world will end in fire,
Some say in ice.
From what I've tasted of desire
I hold with those who favour fire.
But if it had to perish twice,
I think I know enough of hate
To say that for destruction ice
Is also great
And would suffice

-Robert Frost

Cherry blossoms in D.C!

2008-03-31T00:21:00.000+08:00

We drove to Washington DC today to look at cherry trees!
Sorry I mean cherry blossoms.
They were pretty and it was a happy day (:

PIKCHAS!

In Your Absence
Not yet summer,
 but unseasonable heat 
pries open the cherry tree.

It stands there stupefied,
 in its sham, pink frills, 
dense with early blooming.

Then, as afternoon cools 
into more furtive winds, 
I look up to see 
a blizzard of petals
 rushing the sky.

It is only April.
 I can’t stop my own life 
from hurrying by. 
The moon, already pacing.

SEC ONE.

2008-03-29T00:39:00.000+08:00

HI TIQ FINE I'M GONNA POST ABOUT SEC ONE COS YOU REQUESTED HURHUR.
So Sec one was when we were all so very happy go lucky and extremely happy to be in rgs cos it was the OH TOP SCHOOL.
Firstly, I'd just comment on my style of writing and sum it up in one word: gross. And I was looking through (cos someone by the name of atiqabteasri made me post something about secone)

May 20 2005: tiq you're mentioned cos you were helping me with my blog :D
heh tiq you know what i really cant get through all this cos the right side of my head is throbbing so bad it's mad and with all the weird ways of writing in there its hell for me to read it.
(sorry sorry) i'll do it another day kks just remind me again! ><

Read the whole of New Moon today, and for the first half of the book I could completely relate to Bella's experience. Pain and agony I mean, but not to her extent.
And yes the whole too, but I didn't need to use one arm to wrap around my body for fear of it breaking into pieces.

And yesterday I spent a couple of hours putting this snowwhite jigsaw puzzle together cos it made me feel good because after it was done I actually felt like I had accomplished something.

But then it kind of made me think about all those fairytales and how Katie runs around shouting princess princess all the time.

Someone should sue Disney for making every girl believe that they have a prince charming.
&Fairytale endings do not exist in reality;
Neither do fairytales.

Reminiscence.

2008-03-27T22:00:00.000+08:00

reminiscence |ˌreməˈnisəns|
noun
a story told about a past event remembered by the narrator : his reminiscences of his early days in Washington.
• the enjoyable recollection of past events : his story made me smile in reminiscence.
• ( reminiscences) a collection in literary form of incidents and experiences that someone remembers.
• a characteristic of one thing reminding or suggestive of another : his first works are too full of reminiscences of earlier poetry.

Looking back at my past posts (yes I actually went to my archives), I realised a monumental difference in my posts. For one, no matter the amount of stress I was undergoing, you could still sum it up with this :D All those times in school, screwing around and stuffs really made me smile. Referring specifically to September 27 2006 when I was ranting about how I was so stressed I wanted to jump down the building and die (no I am not suicidal not even a bit thank you very much), but that was obviously not going to work because I'm afraid of heights, 'unlike mr mizar's marvelous 'neighbour' who tried committing suicide from the 2nd storey'. I smiled at that.

Further back: September 20 2006. Kayleighwee tried to murder Zhanghao in class (with an eraser) because she and dorcas were aiming for the clock and Zhanghao was standing under it talking to Jingwei. Right before kay threw the eraser Zhanghao actually said this to Jingwei: 'Jingwei, 经过我的观察，我觉得你是属于一个怪人.' (When translated into English, it means 'through my observations, I feel that you are a weirdo' - said to my ex-classmate by my ex-chinese teacher). I laughed real hard at that.

Those were the days, probably the happiest days of my life, (and days that never ended by breaking your heart).
202'06 <3

February 2006: CNY.
I wouldn't exactly call those days the best and the happiest, but at least I was with them.
With people that care and that matter, with people I love.
This photo in my post especially struck me:

It's funny how I told her to not be it, and now I am it.
Ironic.

5 more days til break ends.
And a month since hell froze over.

Mope.

2008-03-26T21:57:00.000+08:00

So someone on my tagboard requested that I blog about something more interesting.
Well sorry to let you down but there really isn't anything in my life that is remotely interesting (or lets just put it this way - nothing in my life you want to know about that is remotely interesting). I guess the most interesting I've come across so far is this, something I found on Annie's blog yesterday.

'combined was funny only towards the end. everyone was like half dying from fantasia. ms ku was going through figures M and N and she was trying to pronounce M and N clearly lol cos there was alot of (fake) confusion.

Annie: Ms. Ku what don't you just say M for...
Mich: Michelle! Michelle! M for michelle!
Annie: Yeah! Then N for aNnie!
Strings laughs and cellists go omg.
Ms. Ku (shoots a weird look): A for Annie! E for AnnieeEEEEEEEEEEEE!
Strings starts laughing loudly. Lanabel says something about A, N, E and A & E
Annie: Huh?
Ms. Ku: Ok shhh, if you don't to hear Michelle and Annie again, come in on time!

Then Michelle starts doing it with Ms Ku's name-- Marietta, maRietta, marieTTa, mariettA. omg freaking funny la the way she did it.

Ms. Ku: Let's go from O!
Mich: Oh-oh! (uh-oh)'

Now Mich, wouldn't you say that that was interesting? :D
I would.

And so this is the result of our conversation one fine night at approximately oneam:
HATTIE: 'I don't see why people make such a big deal out of boys wearing whity tighties and not boxers when they reach a certain age. I mean, take professional swimmers as an example. They wear whity tightie looking Speedos and not boxer looking..... trunks. But I guess it is funny to hear that he wears whity tighties and my brother who's only 11 is already wearing boxers.'

Sorry friends you might not get this one but to give hattie credit I had to put it there.
HI HATTIEAHN :D

Okay so I was looking at Celene's profile on facebook and noticed this very familiar quote:
celene: i'm nervous.
xianmin: oh man! dont be!
celene: but i am :(
xianmin: oh..um.......just imagine the audience are all in their underwear!
Come to think of it I actually remember xianmin telling me that when I was going to perform at VCH.
That was .. 2 years ago.

Time flies (even when) you're not having fun.

'October

November

December

4. Waking Up'

she took 4 months.
i might take as long;

or longer.

2008-03-25T23:18:00.000+08:00

Hello strangers. It's been 7 months since I thought that it was high time to update.
And as kayleighwee put it: she declares this blog to be dead.
NOT.

SO.

I'm on spring break at my uncle's house in Pennsylvania, in case any of you were wondering why I suddenly had so much time on my hands to spare. There aren't many things I wanna post here (due to the fact that a blog is public and some things are meant to be kept secret and buried forever).

I guess the most important thing now is that I miss you guys back home.
Unbelievable, but it's the first time I've been homesick;
And it's all because it happened.
It changed my entire life,
and as such,
it changed me.

&all I can do now, is let go.

2007-09-05T01:47:00.000+08:00

omg its like 147am and i just finished DINNER. if i continue at this rate im gonna be keiraknightly numbertwo. oh wait sorry i meant chop off like 25cm yea. so what have i been doing you ask me? firstly today the whole day we've been shopping for necessities like hairdrier and dustbins and whatnots. and my legs are friggin tired i swear they shrunk another cm wth. and then we went to interlochen for registration then we like practically 'moved in' and unpacked all the suitcases and carton boxes and cleaned the damn place which was so filthy and gross and ew. and yea you get the point. and all those friggin piano books la OHMYGAWD. like my arms are friggin tired too they're gonna drop off tmr yayy. then i can come home alr woohoo. okay nvm thats just like bull.

EE MY DAD IS WEARING MY MUMS JACKET THAT IS SO GAYY. okayokay back to the point.
so therefore i took pikchass of what it looks like AFTER the mega makeover okay not mega minor.
yayy. i am damn tired so i shall go to sleep.
toodles (:

2007-09-04T00:23:00.000+08:00

HELLO PEOPLE MY FIRST OFFICIAL DAY AWAY FROM HOME AND IT IS VERY VERY DEPRESSING I ASSURE YOU.
AND.

PLEASE GO TO www.welovepanyian.blogspot.com (dont wry its not me who created it).
THANK YOU CELESTINELIM AND GANG!
panyian loves you all forever and ever.
<3

2007-09-01T09:43:00.001+08:00

gawd friggin stop crying NOW.
damnit.

2007-08-31T23:00:00.000+08:00

ohmygawd i still cant believe i actually cried omg. ahhhh.
anw IN A NUTSHELL: like after celebrations (ALL HAIL TEACHERS OF RGS ESPECIALLY THE GUY TEACHERS OMGG) i went to pacific plaza then walked to forum to buy flowers from toysrus then walked back to mrt took train to j8 ate lunch with eileen and weilin waited for jo and lyd then we went to take a photo then went to kodak to print to put in the very cute toy thing they bought me (LOVE YOU GUYS) whereas i walked to ri to meet hh and to pass him the flowers. and we were like talking about the old days lahh quite funny actually. after all we've known each other for 9 years omg. i feel old.

BREATHE.

then they very champ cos no bus so we WALKED to marymount yes friggin WALKED like as if i didnt walk enough lahh wth. then when we finally reached there we went to see gu lao shi and then me and lyd first waited for like um lets see 10billion years before we FINALLY got a taxi then it jammed like nobodys business before plaza sing there lahh walao.

RENDEZVOUSHOTEL.

no rendezvous no worries. then i took train from dobyghaut to orchard then my hp damn smart conked out. freaking funny lahh i used youknowwhos phone to call xuanwei then she thought was like my pri sch friend's phone so she called back LOL. and yea couldnt find them and stuffs but still found them in the end!
YAYY LOVE YOU JOKIMXUANWEIZOOGIE! (the zookeeper, if you're really that deep :D)

oogies photos! haha yayy we learned to self time the cam woohoohoo.

HAHA JO! <3

2007-08-19T23:45:00.000+08:00

IT'S FAT, COS IT'S FULL OF LOVE!
HAPPYTHREEMONTHS LOVE.
190507;
te amo, je'taime, [watchmacallit in german :D]

2007-08-18T23:59:00.000+08:00

FIRST <3 meltmeltmelt woohoohoo.
went out with celene and xiannie today!
WE SAT AT STARBUCKS AND TOLD JOKES! AND WENT TO THE DECK THERE TO TAKE PICS!

but the day had to be ruined, as usual. despite the fact that i reached home before yeye nainai and despite the fact that i ran all the way from the mrt station back home. but banning me from seeing anyone is too much for me to handle, how long more do i have in singapore? foochuanhong had the courtesy to tell me 18days on friendster.

in simple terms, its called house arrest;